A bitchfest, of sorts:

1. Busking = Panhandling I take music pretty seriously. It's disturbing to me to see a show when people are talking all over it, or to see people treat music so flippantly. There's a guy downtown who sings for money with his guitar and while I appreciate the fact that he is trying to earn the quarters and dollars in his cup, I still find a lot of it annoying. To my knowledge, "House of the Rising Sun" does not have a breakdown in it that goes "Hey there guy / You have a good day." If you are going to play the songs, play them with some heart and not just as a tepid act to scrounge up some loose change.

2. "Yes, you are talking too loudly" and "No, the signal in the elevator isn't good" When will people learn that talking louder doesn't help a bad cell phone signal. It's like talking louder to someone who speaks another language--it doesn't aid in communication, it just makes you louder. As a general rule, the elevator is not a place for a cell phone conversation.

3. Flip Flops Okay, so maybe the Banana Republic, the Gap, and Abercrombie have spent millions on making flip flops cool, but really, they are not the kind of footwear that's appropriate in most settings. Sandals, okay, I can live with sandals. But please, would someone get all the frat boys and mall clones to leave the flip flops in the shower or at the beach and invest in something that says "I am taking this place at least seriously enough to put on real shoes."?

4. Expensive car/Cheap apartment It doesn't add up, does it?

5. Message Board Hystrionics Is it possible to post an opinion on a message board without using the phrases "ass clown", "sucks nuts", or "elephant spooge"? Likewise, is it possible to get someone to clarify a point you find confusing or maybe not fully fleshed out without condescending? Apparently, the answer is no.

6. Bad Movie Trailers You wanna see a trailer that makes you want to see a movie? Check out the first trailer for Garden State. You wanna see a trailer that tries to appeal to the lowest common denominator and probably spoils all of the best/funniest parts of a movie without actually making any of it enjoyable? Try any other trailer out there. It's a wonder I go to see any movies at all, because from the trailers, they all look like garbage.

7. Thrift Store T-Shirt Thrift Store T-Shirt, I love you. You are so clever and ironic and you are multi-colored. You have charm because you were once owned by someone who took your message seriously, but because I don't have to. Also, you have rings around the collar and sleeves. When I wear you, I feel funky and unique because I don't REALLY like Diet Pepsi or Twinkies, and I've never been to Tony Roma's and I didn't spend a summer at Lake Ogonquin Summer Camp, but those things are cute. It's funny to show off what I don't like as if it was something that I did like, because, you know, that's like backwards! I love you because you make me an individual, unlike those goth kids who all wear black or those metal kids who all have long hair and Sepultura t-shirts; my friends and I can all have a Thrift Store T-Shirt and we can go out together and it's cool, cause, like, who doesn't root for Thompson Middle School Girl's Vollyeball? And you are cheap, which leaves me more money for PBR.